I wish to be on the wings....

I find solace in the past
more in looking at the past that I once loved
There is more to who we are
than we are now

That past is where I loved
where I hurt
yearned
grew

That is where I go when in the present
I hurt
yearn and need to grow
above who I thought I could be

so I know that even as
'I wish I knew then what I know now'
is a typical saying
I believe that I knew something in the past
that I should not let go of
but sometimes
forget

So I opened up a past favorite
She
by Saul Williams
(I saw him perform and he can move that mountain in your heart)

and this is the page that my past self turned reminding myself to look again...


"I rushed home
from life to life
asleep
my dreams waiting
to not be remembered, past

and I yearn
for the strength and courage
to sucker punch moments
so that they may swell
and ripen blackened blue
like sweetest night"

-by Saul Williams